The Truth will set us free

It was not easy for me to write these lines but it was even harder to look inside of me with honesty and admit that the compromises I accepted devoured me. I had arrived to the point where I could no longer recognize what was right and what was wrong. In the last 10 years l lived in a world that took away everything from me: my dreams, my ideals, my dignity. The corrupted system of money and power marked my life. I was wrong to choose the way that I thought was easier but revealed itself as   devastating for me: I deluded myself into being happy. I was a “friend” of the powerful, engaged to rich men, I had everything I desired: success, money, clothes, jewels… But at what price? I know that the past can’t be undone but I also know that the present is in our hands and the future depends on the choices we make now. They always told me: “The world is like this, my dear, learn to navigate.” And so I navigated, oh… of course I navigated… I went so far that I was no longer aware of the reality.

I don’t want to be the woman from the scarlet letter anymore, nor be the victim; I want to change my life by telling you my story because this is the story of the world. We all believe in certain principles and certain rules, we delight each other with beautiful words like justice, love, freedom, but as soon we feel endangered, we are ready to betray and trample on anyone. We are so convinced that the end justifies the means that we’ve lost our identity. “But what can I do?” I used to tell myself. In this world if you don’t belong to a group, an organization or a political color, you don’t go ahead. The competence, the talent are not enough, working for 18 hours per day is not enough, however it requires friends in high places. We all know it works like this and we accepted this system to the point that being recommended has become a normal thing. What a world have we built?

I look around me and I see desperate people who don’t know what to feed their own children with and then I see the other people who wallow in wealth and luxury, joking with the millions from the weekly press covers with stories of dubious relationships.Like “the love story” of Francesca Pascale and Silvio Berlusconi. This is a big staging because Francesca is a lesbian and I was more than a friend to her. Silvio had decided to announce their engagement publicly only to continue having fun with her and her female “friends”, and to avoid being judged by the society. He thought he calculated it well but he found himself with an authoritarian “fiancée” who had no scruples. In fact he asked me many times to take her away from Arcore because, as he used to say, she was a bad person and she blackmailed him.This is only one of the many lies which I forced myself to live in. But I don’t want to live in the lies anymore.

I suffer knowing that in this exact moment there are people who have lost everything and are thinking about suicide, while others think about orgies and the striped coat of a poodle. There are people who have a problem with making it to the end of the month, while others have a problem with spending ten thousand euro in cash for one day only. And then, there are people who sell themselves and other people who buy them… There is such a big gap between the problems of these two categories of people that nothing can fill it. Still the saddest thing is that the one who suffers continues to vote for the one who flagellates him. For desperation, for ignorance, for good faith… all plausible reasons but the result is that thus he won’t change a thing. Leibniz used to say: “This is the best of all possible worlds”. I don’t want to accept anymore that this is the best possible world. If we are the world, then we are able to change it.

Some time ago I published an open letter in my blog that narrated my professional life in the world of entertainment in the last 10 years. Today I decided to complete this letter, to tell you the truth about what I’ve lived through. Of how you can lose yourself while you think you are fulfilling your dreams… and one day you understand that it’s not worth it. I am here in front of you to testify that no dream is worth our lives, our dignity of human beings. I am conscious that my revelations will be inconvenient to someone; that they’ll try to stop me, to discredit me, maybe to kill me… But I want to let everyone know that I have nothing left but the truth, and this is what I want to share with you in the next days. The Truth will set us free.